How will moving home make a difference? Talk with your boomerang kid about specific goals that will be advanced by the move. One of the most common goals is saving money. Using that example, discuss related plans, for example, if your adult child is working, is there a budget in place that reasonable allows her to reach savings goals? If he is not working has he identified a job search strategy?

When and what kind of company is okay? Every household is different. Talk together to learn what works best for everyone. For example, are overnight guests okay?

How will chores be handled? Ideally, everyone will pitch in to keep the house in order. Decide what works before you have a sink filled with dishes.

How long will the living arrangement last? Don’t be afraid to establish a deadline upfront.

How, if at all, will your adult child contribute financially to the household?

Keep the conversation going even after your adult child moves in. Your relationship has likely grown and changed since your child left home and returned. This can be a really great opportunity to rediscover each other in ways you never imagined.

Indeed, most relationship counselors, including The Rules Girls, Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider, agree that logging on can be a great way to meet your match.

The Advantages of Online Dating
Dr. Ellen Kriedman (also known as Dr. Ellen) says online dating is an advantage for people who are uncomfortable about meeting people in public places, or who are new to an area. Online dating services also can be a good option if you frequently travel for work or have children or other responsibilities that make going out to meet people difficult.

What’s more, you’re not confined to the area where you live. You can search the world, since you have international access via the Internet.

And you can meet people without fear of commitment. Online dating services provide chat rooms that allow you to get to know someone before you exchange photos or phone numbers.

In addition, most sites allow the user to place a photo along with a personal ad, and some even have audio capability so you can listen to your potential soul mate’s voice. While this may sound a bit superficial at first, Internet dating actually takes the whole “meat market” aspect out of the dating process because it allows you to weed out the players.

Choosing an Online-Dating Service
With so many online dating services out there, picking one can be difficult. Dr. Ellen advises people to do their homework. Shop around until you find one that best suits your particular needs. Narrow your search by looking at services that specialize in matching people with similar interests. For example, you might consider a dating service for people who share the same religious faith, like BigChurch.com, ChristianCafe.com or JDate.com; if you’re a sports enthusiast, you might check out fitness-singles.com. The list goes on …

While e-dating is a dream come true for some, The Rules Girls warn that an e-courtship has more dating hazards than ever — and they’re not what you think! Whether you meet online, at work, or in a bar, email has become an integral part of most relationships, so you need to be prepared to handle a cyber relationship.

The Pitfalls of Email Courtship
Fein and Schneider say email is just like a phone call if it leads to a date. But there are pitfalls unique to the medium. For one thing, it’s very easy to be seduced by the informality of email or instant messaging.

Remember the scene in Bridget Jones’ Diary when Bridget (Rene Zellweger) gets lured into sexually charged email banter initiated by her boss (Hugh Grant)? Conducting e-relationships can be tricky because, as Bridget found out, email often allows people to become too casual too fast. Fein and Schneider advise that “less is more” when writing a personal ad, email or instant message. Too many intense feelings can scare men and women away.

And online dating can make it more difficult to weed out the “undesirables.” Fein and Schneider counsel many women who become involved in “fantasy relationships” that never materialize. Fantasy men typically chat up a storm and never ask the woman out.

Finally, don’t believe everything you read. Most online dating services ask participants to fill out long questionnaires about themselves. Women usually put a lot of thought into these, but men don’t. A man may indicate that his favorite movie is When Harry Met Sally and he loves romantic walks on the beach. This will certainly attract women. But, in reality, most men would choose to watch basketball on TV over the beach walk, and Dirty Harry is a more likely contender in the “Favorite Movie” category.

Make Sure to Delete Mr. Wrong
“Little white lies” on someone’s profile may be harmless, but there are some creeps trolling the online dating services. If you’re going to cyber date, here are some screening tips to help you delete Mr. Wrong:

• Ask a man for a photo. If he doesn’t send one, or keeps making up excuses, there’s something wrong. Of course, if he has too many photos with his ad, that can be equally problematic.
• Ignore men who write form letters or send only a “wink” or a “rose,” or who write something like “you’re sexy.”
• Don’t answer email from men with “player” names, such as “MeTarzan.”

Sherrie and Ellen also advise women not to “have sex” online. The Rules girls say, “Delete/Next” to these men.

A Word About Online Dating Safety
If you meet someone online, take it slowly. You may think that you know the person because you have been corresponding via email, but remember to use common sense.

• Guard your anonymity. Most online dating services use a “double blind” system that protects your identity. Be sure not to include your last name, address, place of work, phone number or any other identifying information when corresponding online.
• Request a photo. Appearance can help you determine whether the person is someone you want to correspond with. If the person doesn’t send a photo and makes excuses, stop corresponding with him.
• Speak on the phone. While the Rules Girls advise women not to push the “relationship” from email to phone (let the man call you!), a phone call can reveal much about a person’s social skills. If you decide to speak with someone on the phone, give your cell phone number or ask the person for his number. Also use telephone-blocking techniques so he can’t get your number through caller ID.
• Meet in a public place. If you decide to meet, choose a safe place, such as a restaurant during a busy time. Tell a friend where you’re going and what time you plan to return. Give your friend the person’s name and phone number. Never arrange for someone to pick you up at your home or office. Take your own transportation. When the date is over, do not allow the person to follow you.
• Watch for warning signs. If a person displays anger, tries to pressure you, gives inconsistent information about himself (even age!), refuses to speak to you on the phone after you’ve established an email correspondence, something isn’t right. Move on.
• Protect yourself. If you feel uncertain about someone, get offline. If you’re in a public place with a person, excuse yourself and call a friend from the ladies room and ask that person to come and meet you. If you feel unsafe, call the police. Don’t be embarrassed. Be safe.

When do you feel like your sexiest self? When you’re all dolled up, rocking your little black dress and heels and the perfect lipstick? When you’ve kicked butt at work? When you slip into something silky and slinky? We know how good those all feel, but here’s the truth: Getting primped and perfumed — or even showing a little leg — has nothing to do with what makes your guy really want you. Yes, at first a man may be drawn in by come-hither cues — a flash of lace, a glimpse of cleavage. But once his heart is yours for keeps, he has a totally different idea of what makes you alluring.

“When a man is in love, what he finds really attractive is the feeling that he’s seeing you for who you truly are,” explains REDBOOK Love Network expert Scott Haltzman, M.D., author of The Secrets of Happily Married Women. “To a guy, the makeup, the sexy outfit, it’s all a mask. He wants the woman behind the mask. Openness, vulnerability, an air of contentment — those things are what really turns him on.”

We asked seven women to tell us when they feel most desirable — then got the scoop from each of their guys on what makes him hot for her. Here, the sweet, sexy, and surprising answers:

Stilettos and cleavage…or natural beauty?

Angela Betancourt, 30
Rich Betancourt, 38
Married eight months

ANGELA: The irony is that whenever I feel my hottest — say, when I wear a low-cut blouse and fabulous black stilettos — Rich rarely finds me sexy! I like to wear super-shiny lip gloss, but Rich thinks it’s more sticky than kissable; and if I stare longingly into his eyes he just thinks I’m being cheesy. I also feel attractive anytime I’m in candlelight — in fact, I always light candles in the bedroom. I’m sure Rich wonders why I’m so candle obsessed.

RICH: I find Angela the most irresistible when she’s zoned out on the couch in front of the TV after a long day at work. She’s not wearing any makeup or jewelry. Everything is stripped away, and she’s just totally relaxed. I’ll look over at her beautiful face and think, Wow, this is a great shot. I have to take a picture. Her natural beauty turns me on much more than when she’s all dolled up.

Sharing private time…or working the room?

Charisse Lombardo-Moore, 38
Salvatore Moore, 35
Married nine years

CHARISSE: I feel sexiest when my husband and I are strongly connected. We’re always close and love each other, but let’s face it, after being together for 15 years, those emotions sometimes get lost in the everyday. But when we reconnect, it’s powerful. For example, we went to Puerto Rico this year to celebrate my birthday. Every day we went to the beach, where we read and talked and took long walks. It was so calming and intimate. Later in the week, on the actual day of my birthday, Sal took me shopping for clothes. By this time, I felt so great about our marriage — and so incredibly desirable. To show him how I was feeling, I began modeling sexy bathing suits for him, something I’ve never done before. You could feel the sexual tension in the air!

SALVATORE: I find Charisse most attractive when we are out with a group of friends and she is sharing a story about a recent experience. She tells the story with such conviction and passion. Her smile is warm and generous, and everyone around us is always drawn to her and engrossed by what she’s saying. I feel proud and always have an urge to get close to her. Her presence brightens any room in a way I can’t fully describe. I would bet that any of the women we spend time with are envious and would give almost anything to walk just one mile in her shoes.

Belly dancing…or talking politics?

Jeanny Weinstein, 30
Ethan Weinstein, 36
Married three years

JEANNY: I feel so sexy when I belly dance. It’s a very sensual movement. I just started taking classes and each time I go, I feel more and more in tune with my body. When I get good enough, I may do some dancing for Ethan. I think he’d like to watch me move like that!

ETHAN: I always find Jeanny sexy — she’s gorgeous! But her interest in politics and her ability to talk intelligently about it is what I really find attractive. Jeanny grew up in a very nonpolitical household, but she’s become a lot more informed and concerned about the world. We’ll go see political documentaries together and spend lots of time afterward discussing them. I suppose, though, I like this part the best: Although Jeanny is a very amicable and tolerant person, she’s been in situations where she’s been surrounded by people who have strongly opposed her views — and she has always stood firmly by her beliefs no matter what. Watching her defend her ideas makes me want to scoop her up and take her into the bedroom.

Sharing successes…or sharing dreams?

Sharon Anderson, 37
Jim Anderson, 46
Married eight years

SHARON: Doing something I love and being successful at it is what really makes me feel sexy. For example, I direct a local high school musical each spring. When the show finally goes up on opening night and I feel proud of the work, it’s exciting for me to have Jim in the audience to share it with. I feel strong and accomplished — and therefore desirable.

JIM: Whenever Sharon talks about having children, she projects an aura that I find irresistible. We’ve both been involved in kids’ organizations for years, and I already have two kids of my own from my first marriage. Since my girls were toddlers, Sharon has been there for them — not as a substitute mom, but as their friend and guiding hand. I love her all the more for what she has given the girls, and I want nothing more in the world than to have a baby with her. This shared desire gives our lovemaking an undertone of tenderness and purpose. Thinking of her as a mom makes her incredibly sexy to me.

Hot mama…or earth mother?

Sandra Juliano, 36
Michael Juliano, 43
Married seven years

SANDRA: I feel sexiest when I go through the “transformation” from mom to woman. I switch from sneakers to heels and from baby-food-stained clothing to a clean and stylish outfit. I put on Chanel perfume and take out my scrunchie and let my hair fall to my shoulders — without having to worry about my kids pulling it or getting syrup in it! I walk and talk differently — I feel different. There’s no heavy diaper bag weighing me down on one side, and there is never any mention of SpongeBob or Lightning McQueen. I go from being an active mom who reads silly stories about talking cars and who blows raspberries with the baby to the adventurous and flirty girl Michael met 11 years ago.

MICHAEL: To me, Sandra is sexiest whenever I see her interact with our children. When my wife and I were dating, I was always intrigued by the way she was with kids. Her warmth, tenderness, and caring way seemed so natural. I was already intensely attracted to her, but envisioning her as the mother of my children made her even hotter.

Recently, when our family went to a Mexican restaurant for dinner, my youngest son started to dance to the Spanish music that played in the background. A huge smile came over Sandra’s face and she joined him to dance in the middle of the restaurant. Her focus was not on who was watching or whether she was being “appropriate” — connecting with our son was all that mattered. It was a beautiful sight, and I could not wait to take home the gorgeous woman dancing in front of me.

Salon-perfect…or messy and sweaty?

Lorenda Layne, 28
Matt Niblack, 28
Married two years

LORENDA: Like most girls, I definitely feel the most sexy when I’ve got my hair relaxed and set, my eyebrows freshly waxed at the salon, and I’m putting on a dress and heels to go out. The attention to detail that’s involved in each of these things gives me a chance to focus on my body and accentuate and showcase my best features. When I know I look my best, I feel more confident — and when I feel confident, I feel sexy.

MATT: I’m most attracted to the things that make Ren unique and show her natural energy. So I love the way she looks the week before she goes to the salon, when her roots have grown so her hair is puffy. I’ve never met a girl who had such voluminous hair. I love to mess it up so that it gets really big. Also, when she’s just gotten home from the gym, all sweaty in her Twizzlers T-shirt, ratty gray yoga pants, and tennis shoes, with her hair pulled back but with a few stray strands plastered to her face. She has a glow in her complexion from doing something she loves, and every part of her body, from hair to sweat, communicates an energy that is very sexy.

Sharing your day…or sharing your night?

Tricia Barefoot, 37
Greg Barefoot, 39
Married 11 years

TRICIA: I feel sexy when all the parts of my life are in happy harmony. When I’ve had a great day with the kids, or have found a way to better our lives, or have completed a task I’m working on, I can’t wait to share these moments with Greg. Knowing that I’ve contributed something great to my world and that the one man I love more than anything sees it too — that’s sexy! So it’s not the little black dress, or the heels, or the hairdo. It’s the idea that the person I love gets me and finds me sexy just for being me.

GREG: The most obvious thing is her apparel — anything silk from Victoria’s Secret worn at night. But Tricia is sexy in how she carries herself too. This might manifest itself in the way she walks, sings a song off-key, or plays with the kids. It’s hard to describe, but during these moments, I’m reminded that I’m no longer married to a girl, but to a very confident and sexy woman.

It’s the rare couple that doesn’t, sooner or later, run into a few bumps in the road. If you recognize ahead of time what those relationship problems can be, you’ll have a much better chance of weathering the storm, experts say.

Ideally, a couple should discuss certain basic issues — such as money, sex, and kids — before they decide to start their life together. Of course, even when you do discuss these issues beforehand, marriage (or a long-term, live-in relationship) is nothing like you think it’s going to be.

In spite of the fact that every marriage experiences relationship problems, couples who are successful have learned how to manage them and keep their love life going, says marriage and family therapist Mitch Temple, MS, author of The Marriage Turnaround. They gain success in marriage by hanging in there, tackling problems, and learning how to maneuver through the complex issues of everyday married life. Many do this by reading self-help books, attending seminars, browsing articles on the Web, going to counseling, observing other successful couples, or simply by trial and error.

Here are some common issues and ways to resolve them:

Relationship Problem: Communication

All relationship problems stem from poor communication skills, says Elaine Fantle Shimberg, author of Blending Families. “You can’t communicate while you’re checking your BlackBerry, watching TV, or flipping through the sports section,” she says.

Problem-solving strategies:

• Make time … yes, an actual appointment with each other, Shimberg says. If you live together, put the cell phones on vibrate, put the kids to bed, and let the answering machine pick up your calls.
• If you can’t “communicate” without raising your voices, go to a public spot like the library, park, or restaurant, where you’d be embarrassed if anyone saw you screaming.
• Set up some rules … like not interrupting until the other is through, banning phrases such as “You always …” or “You never …”
• Remember that a large part of communication is listening, so be sure your body language reflects that. That means, don’t doodle, look at your watch, pick at your nails, etc. Nod so the other person knows you’re getting the message and rephrase if necessary, such as, “What I hear you saying is that you feel as though you have more chores at home, even though we’re both working.” If you’re right, the other can confirm, and if what the other person really meant was, hey, you’re a slob and you create more work for me by having to pick up after you, perhaps they’ll say so but in a nicer way.

Relationship Problem: Sex

Even partners who love each other can be incompatible sexually. Compounding these problems, says Mary Jo Fay, is the fact that men and women alike are sorely lacking in sex education and sexual self-awareness. Yet, having sex is one of the last things we should be giving up, says Fay, who addresses the topic in her new book, Please Dear, Not Tonight. “Sex brings us closer together, releases hormones that help our bodies both physically and mentally, and keeps the chemistry of a healthy couple healthy,” she says.

Problem-solving strategies:

• Plan, plan, plan, Fay says. Make an appointment — not necessarily at night when everyone is tired. Maybe during the baby’s Saturday afternoon nap. Or perhaps a “before-work quickie,” Fay suggests. Or ask Grandma and Grandpa to take the kids every other Friday night for a sleepover. “When sex is on the calendar, it increases your anticipation,” Fay says, adding that mixing things up a bit can increase your sexual enjoyment as well. Why not sex in the kitchen? Sex by the fire? Sex standing up in the hallway?
• California psychotherapist Allison Cohen, MA, MFT, also suggests learning what truly turns your partner on by asking him or her to come up with a personal “Sexy List.” And, of course, you do the same. What do each of you truly find sexy? “The answers may surprise you.” Swap the lists and use them to create more scenarios that turn you both on.
• If your sexual relationship problems can’t be resolved on your own, Fay recommends consulting a qualified sex therapist, who can help you both address and resolve your issues.

Relationship Problem: Money

Money problems can start even before the wedding vows are said, from the expenses of courtship to the high cost of weddings. The National Foundation for Credit Counseling (NFCC) recommends that couples who have money woes take a deep breath and have a serious conversation about finances.

Problem-solving strategies: The NFCC offers the following advice for having that much-needed financial conversation:

• Be honest about your current financial situation. If things have gone south, continuing the same lifestyle that was possible before the loss of income is simply unrealistic.
• Don’t approach the subject in the heat of battle. Instead, set aside a time that is convenient and non-threatening for both parties.
• Acknowledge that one partner may be a saver and one a spender, understanding that there are benefits to both, and agreeing to learn from each other’s tendencies.
• Don’t hide income or debt. Bring financial documents, including a recent credit report, pay stubs, bank statements, insurance policies, debts, and investments to the table.
• Don’t blame.
• Construct a joint budget that includes savings.
• Decide which person will be responsible for paying the monthly bills.
• Allow each person to have independence by setting aside money to be spent at his or her discretion.
• Decide upon short-term and long-term goals. It’s OK to have individual goals, but you should have family goals, too.
• Talk about caring for your parents as they age, and how to appropriately plan for their financial needs, if necessary.

Relationship Problem: Struggles Over Home Chores

Nowadays, most partners work outside the home — and in today’s economy — often at more than one job, so it’s important to equitably divide the labor at home, says Paulette Kouffman Sherman, PhD. She is the author of Dating from the Inside Out: How to Use the Law of Attraction in Matters of the Heart.

Problem-solving strategies:

• Be organized and clear about your respective jobs in the home, Sherman says. “Write all the jobs down and agree on who does what.” Be fair: Make sure each partner’s tasks are equitable so no resentment builds.

Relationship Problem: Not Prioritizing Your Relationship

If you want to keep your love life going, making your relationship a focal point does not end when you say “I do.” “Relationships lose their luster,” says Karen Sherman, PhD, author of Marriage Magic! Find It, Keep It, and Make It Last. “So make yours a priority.”

Problem-solving strategies:

• Do the things you used to do when you were first dating: Make gestures of appreciation, compliment each other, contact each other through the day, and show interest in each other.
• Plan date nights. Schedule time together on the calendar just as you would any other important event in your life.
• Respect one another. Say “thank you,” and “I appreciate … .” It lets your partner know that he/she matters.

Relationship Problem: Conflict

Occasional conflict is an inevitable part of life, says New York-based psychologist Susan Silverman, PhD, but if you and your partner feel like you are starring in your own nightmare version of the movie Groundhog Day, it’s time to break free of this toxic routine. Recognizing these simple truths will lessen anger and enable you to take a calm look at the underlying issue.

Problem-solving strategies:

Conflict resolution skills can help you and your partner learn to argue in a more constructive manner, says Silverman, who offers this advice:

• You are not a victim. It is your choice whether to react and how to react.
• Be honest with yourself. When you’re in the midst of an argument, are your comments directed toward resolution, or are you looking for payback? If your comments are blaming and hurtful, it’s best to take a deep breath and change your strategy.
• Change it up. If you continue to respond in the same way that has brought you pain and unhappiness in the past, you can’t expect a different result this time. Just one little shift can make a big difference. If you usually jump right in to defend yourself before your partner is finished speaking, hold off for a few moments. You’ll be surprised at how such a small shift in tempo can change the whole tone of an argument.
• Give a little; get a lot. Apologize when you’re wrong. Sure it’s tough, but just try it and watch something wonderful happen.

“You can’t control anyone else’s behavior,” Silverman says. “The only one in your charge is you.”

Relationship Problem: Trust

Trust is an essential part of a relationship. Are there certain behaviors that are causing you to not trust your partner, or do you have unresolved issues that are hindering you from trusting others?

Problem-solving strategies: You and your partner can develop trust in each other by following these tips, suggested by Fay.

• Be consistent.
• Be on time.
• Do what you say you will do.
• Don’t lie — not even little white lies, to your partner or to others.
• Be fair, even in an argument.
• Be sensitive to the other’s feelings. You can still disagree but don’t discount how your partner is feeling.
• Call when you say you will.
• Call to say you’ll be home late.
• Carry your fair share of the workload.
• Don’t overreact when things go wrong.
• Never say things you can’t take back.
• Don’t dig up old wounds.
• Respect your partner’s boundaries.
• Don’t be jealous.
• Be a good listener.

Although relationships have their ups and downs, there are things you can both do that may well minimize marriage problems, if not help avoid them altogether, says psychologist Karen Sherman. Be realistic. Thinking your mate will meet all your needs — and will be able to figure them out without your asking — is a Hollywood fantasy. “Ask for what you need directly,” Karen Sherman says.

Use humor — learn to let things go and enjoy one another more. And be willing to work on your relationship and to truly look at what needs to be done. Don’t think that it will be better with someone else; the same problems you have in this relationship because of lack of skills will still exist.

• Take a folic acid supplement every day. This reduces the chance of certain birth defects. Do not wait until you are pregnant to do this.
• Make a doctor’s appointment for a checkup/wellness visit.
• Make sure to get and begin taking prenatal vitamins.
• Check with your doctor about any over-the-counter and prescription medications you currently take.
• See your dentist for a cleaning or checkup if you have not done so in the last six months. Untreated gum disease is linked to preterm birth.
• Look into local prenatal exercise classes.
• Review maternity/paternity leave options at work and your health insurance’s maternity coverage.
• Develop a maternity and baby budget.
• If you smoke, quit.
• Limit alcohol and caffeine intake.
• Stock your refrigerator with healthy foods and snacks.

Of course, right now, you might not feel up to taking an active role in anything. You might have doubts that treatment will help. But push yourself. Depression can make you feel powerless. Taking charge of your treatment is one way to feel in control again.

Here are some tips.

• Stick with it. Treatment won’t work right away. Antidepressants may not take effect for four to six weeks. In some cases, a medication may not work and you’ll need to try another. Therapy can take awhile, too. But don’t despair. If you give them time, these treatments are very likely to help. When a depressed person gets the right medicine, at the right dose, and takes it long enough, treatment succeeds about 70% of the time. But you and your doctor may need to try quite a few treatments before landing on the right therapy for you.
• Take your medicine as prescribed. Get into good habits. Take your medicine at the same time every day. It’s easier to remember if you do it along with another activity, like brushing your teeth, eating breakfast, or getting into bed. Get a weekly pillbox, which will make it easy to see if you’ve missed a dose.
• Never stop taking your medicine without your doctor’s OK. If you need to stop taking a medicine for some reason, your doctor may reduce your dose gradually. If you stop suddenly, you may have side effects. Stopping medication abruptly may also cause depression to return.

Don’t assume that you can stop taking your medicine when you feel better. Many people need ongoing treatment even when they’re feeling well. This can prevent them from getting depressed again. Remember, if you’re feeling well now, it might be because your medicine is working. So why stop?

• Make lifestyle changes. There’s a lot you can do on your own to supplement your treatment. Eat healthy foods, high in fruits and vegetables and low in sugars and fats. Make sure to get a good night’s sleep. Several studies show that physical activity can help with the symptoms of depression. Start slowly. Try taking walks around the neighborhood with a friend. Gradually, work up to exercising on most days of the week.
• Reduce stress at home and at work. Ask for help with some of the stressful things in your life. See if your friends or family will take care of some of the daily hassles, like housework. If your job is stressing you out, figure out ways to scale back some of your duties.
• Be honest. Opening up to a therapist isn’t easy. But if you’re not truthful, therapy is less likely to help. If you have doubts about therapy or your therapist’s approach, don’t hide them. Instead, talk about them openly with your therapist. He or she will be happy to have your feedback. Together, you might be able to work out a new approach that works better.
• Be open to new ideas. Your therapist may have suggestions that sound strange. He or she may push you to do things that feel awkward or uncomfortable. But try to stay open. Give new approaches a try. You may find them more helpful than you expected.
• Don’t give up. You may feel hopeless right now. You may feel like you’re never going to get better. But feeling that way is a symptom of your condition. If you give yourself some time — and allow your treatment to take effect — you will feel better again.

If you’re confiding in a friend about sleep problems, the conversation might turn to topics like not getting enough rest or tossing and turning at night. But what about things your body does during sleep – like drooling, snoring, bedwetting, or passing gas – that you might be embarrassed to talk about by the light of day?

For example, take Kindra Hall, vice president of sales at a network marketing firm in Phoenix. She admits that drooling excessively while sleeping is a major source of embarrassment, especially when she’s been caught in the act. Soaked bed pillows and stained throw pillows are constant reminders of her humiliating habit.

“I’m very conscious about saliva control,” Hall tells WebMD via email, “but as soon as my eyes are closed and I enter dreamland, all bets are off.”

You might not even be aware of your sleeping habits — until your bed partner clues you in. Sometimes, these behaviors are a part of the natural sleep process. Other times, what you might consider a nuisance – like snoring — could be a sign of an underlying sleep problem.

“It’s important for people to realize what is a normal phenomenon versus something that needs further evaluation,” says William Kohler, MD, medical director of Florida Sleep Institute in Spring Hill, Fla.

Here is the lowdown on your nighttime habits – why they happen and when they could be a sign of something more serious.

During the summer months, one of the most common causes of car breakdowns is overheating. Your car’s cooling system should be completely flushed and refilled as recommended in your owner’s manual. The level, condition, and concentration of your car’s coolant should be checked periodically.

If your car overheats never remove the radiator cap until the engine has completely cooled! Have a professional should the tightness and condition of drive belts, clamps, and hoses.

3. Avoid revving or idling engine over 30 seconds. For every two minutes a car is idling, it uses about the same amount of fuel it takes to go about one mile.

4. Fill gas tank during cooler evening. Filling your gas take during evening hours will to cut down on evaporation.

5. Take care of your tires

Tire care is especially critical in warm weather because long trips, heavy loads, high speeds and higher temperatures all put additional stress on your tires.

• Check your tires regularly to be sure there are no visible signs of wear or damage.
• Be sure your tires are properly inflated. Check your tire pressure often with a gauge, especially on long trips. You can find the recommended inflation pressure in your owner’s manual, on a label frequently found in the glove box, near the door latch on the driver’s side, or other locations on your vehicle. Serious injury can result from tire failure because of under inflation or overloading.
• Never overload your vehicle. Your car and tires are designed to operate safely only up to their load limits. These limits are shown in your owner’s manual and on the certification plate on the edge of the driver’s door.
• Make sure there is enough tread on the tire to operate safely, and make sure the tires are wearing normally. All grooves should be visible and deep enough to at least touch the top of Lincoln’s head on a penny inserted head first in the tread.
• If some spots on the tire seem to be wearing faster than others, see your service station or mechanic. You could have misaligned wheels, worn shock absorbers, or other potential problems.
• Don’t drive at a high rate of speed for a long time, particularly in hot weather. Lower speeds mean better gas mileage.

Feeling rundown? Try laughing more. Some researchers think laughter just might be the best medicine, helping you feel better and putting that spring back in your step.

“I believe that if people can get more laughter in their lives, they are a lot better off,” says Steve Wilson, MA, CSP, a psychologist and laugh therapist. “They might be healthier too.”

Yet researchers aren’t sure if it’s actually the act of laughing that makes people feel better. A good sense of humor, a positive attitude, and the support of friends and family might play a role, too.

“The definitive research into the potential health benefits of laughter just hasn’t been done yet,” says Robert R. Provine, professor of psychology and neuroscience at the University of Maryland, Baltimore County and author of Laughter: A Scientific Investigation.

But while we don’t know for sure that laughter helps people feel better, it certainly isn’t hurting.

Laughter Therapy: What Happens When We Laugh?

We change physiologically when we laugh. We stretch muscles throughout our face and body, our pulse and blood pressure go up, and we breathe faster, sending more oxygen to our tissues.

People who believe in the benefits of laughter say it can be like a mild workout — and may offer some of the same advantages as a workout.

“The effects of laughter and exercise are very similar,” says Wilson. “Combining laughter and movement, like waving your arms, is a great way to boost your heart rate.”

One pioneer in laughter research, William Fry, claimed it took ten minutes on a rowing machine for his heart rate to reach the level it would after just one minute of hearty laughter.

And laughter appears to burn calories, too. Maciej Buchowski, a researcher from Vanderbilt University, conducted a small study in which he measured the amount of calories expended in laughing. It turned out that 10-15 minutes of laughter burned 50 calories.

While the results are intriguing, don’t be too hasty in ditching that treadmill. One piece of chocolate has about 50 calories; at the rate of 50 calories per hour, losing one pound would require about 12 hours of concentrated laughter!

Laughter’s Effects on the Body

In the last few decades, researchers have studied laughter’s effects on the body and turned up some potentially interesting information on how it affects us:

• Blood flow. Researchers at the University of Maryland studied the effects on blood vessels when people were shown either comedies or dramas. After the screening, the blood vessels of the group who watched the comedy behaved normally — expanding and contracting easily. But the blood vessels in people who watched the drama tended to tense up, restricting blood flow.
• Immune response. Increased stress is associated with decreased immune system response, says Provine. Some studies have shown that the ability to use humor may raise the level of infection-fighting antibodies in the body and boost the levels of immune cells, as well.
• Blood sugar levels. One study of 19 people with diabetes looked at the effects of laughter on blood sugar levels. After eating, the group attended a tedious lecture. On the next day, the group ate the same meal and then watched a comedy. After the comedy, the group had lower blood sugar levels than they did after the lecture.
• Relaxation and sleep. The focus on the benefits of laughter really began with Norman Cousin’s memoir, Anatomy of an Illness. Cousins, who was diagnosed with ankylosing spondylitis, a painful spine condition, found that a diet of comedies, like Marx Brothers films and episodes of Candid Camera, helped him feel better. He said that ten minutes of laughter allowed him two hours of pain-free sleep.

The Evidence: Is Laughter the Best Medicine?

But things get murky when researchers try to sort out the full effects of laughter on our minds and bodies. Is laughter really good for you? Can it actually boost your energy? Not everyone is convinced.

“I don’t mean to sound like a curmudgeon,” says Provine, “but the evidence that laughter has health benefits is iffy at best.”

He says that most studies of laughter have been small and not well conducted. He also says too many researchers have an obvious bias: they go into the study wanting to prove that laughter has benefits.

For instance, Provine says studies of laughing have often not looked at the effects of other, similar activities. “It’s not really clear that the effects of laughing are distinct from screaming,” Provine says.

Provine says that the most convincing health benefit he’s seen from laughter is its ability to dull pain. Numerous studies of people in pain or discomfort have found that when they laugh they report that their pain doesn’t bother them as much.

But Provine believes it’s not clear that comedy is necessarily better than another distraction. “It could be that a compelling drama would have the same effect.”

One of the biggest problems with laughter research is that it’s very difficult to determine cause and effect.

For instance, a study might show that people who laugh more are less likely to be sick. But that might be because people who are healthy have more to laugh about. Or researchers might find that, among a group of people with the same disease, people who laugh more have more energy. But that could be because the people who laugh more have a personality that allows them to cope better.

So it becomes very hard to say if laughter is actually an agent of change, or just a sign of a person’s underlying condition.

Laughing It Up for Quality of Life

Laughter, Provine believes, is part of a larger picture. “Laughter is social, so any health benefits might really come from being close with friends and family, and not the laughter itself.”

In his own research, Provine has found that we’re thirty times more likely to laugh when we’re with other people than when we’re alone. People who laugh a lot may just have a strong connection to the people around them. That in itself might have health benefits.

Wilson agrees there are limits to what we know about laughter’s benefits.

“Laughing more could make you healthier, but we don’t know,” he tells WebMD. “I certainly wouldn’t want people to start laughing more just to avoid dying — because sooner or later, they’ll be disappointed.”

But we all know that laughing, being with friends and family, and being happy can make us feel better and give us a boost — even though studies may not show why.

So Wilson and Provine agree that regardless of whether laughter actually improves your health or boosts your energy, it undeniably improves your quality of life.

“Obviously, I’m not antilaughter,” says Provine. “I’m just saying that if we enjoy laughing, isn’t that reason enough to laugh? Do you really need a prescription?”

Manchester United will be without Wayne Rooney for Sunday’s English Premier League clash with Blackburn, but manager Alex Ferguson expects the England striker to return from injury next weekend.

Rooney made a shock comeback in Wednesday’s Champions League clash with Bayern Munich, but had to go off with an hour to play after aggravating his ankle problem as United crashed out of Europe’s top club tournament on away goals.

Ferguson believes the injury is not serious and that Rooney will be fit for second-placed United’s clash with local rivals Manchester City next Saturday.

“I don’t think it’s as serious as we said when he got the injury the first time, but I think he’ll be ready for the City game,” the Scot told reporters on Friday. “We’ve got more time to work on it, anyway. Other than that, everyone else is fit.”

Ferguson said he was ready to put faith in Dimitar Berbatov for the short trip to North-West rivals Blackburn, despite keeping the Bulgarian forward on the bench until the final 10 minutes of the 3-2 win against Bayern.

“Yes, I still trust him,” Ferguson said. “He is a good player and there is absolutely no reason why we should doubt that.

“Dimitar has done well in a lot of games recently but we prefer to play with one striker. When we got the man sent off on Wednesday there was no need to bring a striker on because all we were trying to do was go over the line in terms of defending.”

Ferguson hinted that he will rotate his squad as United seek to win and move a point above leaders Chelsea, who take on Aston Villa in the semifinals of the FA Cup on Saturday.

“Given the nature of the game on Wednesday and the energy spent, we have to address the situation of freshness,” he said. “We’ve got a a squad to use — we have the likes of Paul Scholes, Ryan Giggs and Gary Neville and we also have John O’Shea back now.

“He came on against Bayern and did 30 minutes’ work — it’s good to get him back because he’s such a versatile player for us.”